By Natalia Rueda 
Social networks have radically transformed how people interact and perceive their relationships. In this digital environment, talk of “red flags” in the behavior of men and women has become a ubiquitous trend. These signals, often depicted in posts and memes, are seen as indicators of potential trouble and have been adopted as an essential tool in modern dating culture. However, there is growing concern about bias in this trend and an obsession with identifying unwanted behavior, which can lead to an unbalanced and defensive view of relationships.
Each individual brings with them their own history, context and experiences that may manifest in different ways in their interactions with others. Awareness of issues such as consent and mental health is undoubtedly a positive development of our modern era. However, the tendency to quickly identify and categorize behaviors as “red flags” can become problematic. Human relationships are inherently complex and multifaceted; not all situations lend themselves to immediate conclusions. In many cases, it is critical to gather more information and have deeper conversations to understand the context and motivations behind someone’s behavior.
@isabellarjacobs Truly the list goes on and on 🚩 #redflags #neverdate ♬ I Won't Say (I'm In Love) – From "Hercules" / Soundtrack Version – Susan Egan & Cheryl Freeman & LaChanze & Vaneese Thomas & Lillias White & Disney
It is important to remember that there are some “red flags” that are clearly unacceptable, such as physical or verbal violence; there are others that may depend on differences in values, emotional needs or life expectations. In these cases, subjectivity plays an important role since what one person considers to be non-negotiable behavior, for another may be something that can be agreed upon.
The almost obsessive analysis of red flags in social networks has led to the creation of a culture where negative behaviors are emphasized more than positive ones. Social networks, with their tendency to amplify and demonize even the smallest behaviors, have contributed to this narrative. The constant preoccupation with identifying and avoiding red flags can overshadow the opportunity to recognize and appreciate people’s virtues and qualities.
@allisonhoeller 5 red flags in men 🚩🚩 NEVER ignore these red flags! #whotfdidimarry #redflags #redflagsinmen #datingadvice #datingtips #relationshipadvice #forthegirlies ♬ original sound – Allison Hoeller
Many argue that it is not worth spending time trying to change aspects of a person that are unattractive or incompatible in the long run. From this perspective, it is not a matter of “putting up with” undesirable behavior, but of not wasting time on relationships that, because of obvious red flags, are destined to fail.
Red flags can be useful in identifying toxic behaviors and serious incompatibilities, but it is also vital to remember that people are complex beings and should not be reduced to a list of problematic behaviors.